Sunday, May 15, 2011

Heartache

Last night I dreamed that the boy and I were dating again. I think I was scared because I wondered if he would break up with me again, too. I don't know if the dream is the reason, or if seeing him earlier this week is, or if running into one of his ex-girlfriends, or if buying baby things and holding my new little nephew are the reasons, but that ache in my chest has persisted throughout the day today. The topic in sacrament meeting was friendship. I think I miss our friendship and am sad that we didn't do a better job at developing ours. And, my! I just miss him.

I assure you that I'm doing much better than I was. I have felt like I was Bella when she wakes up after months of being out of it after Edward leaves. I've felt awake again, so I guess a day, here and there, is nothing to complain about.

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