Sunday, May 27, 2012

Grades

So I shouldn't be stressed about school anymore because my students already had their last day, and I should just need to enter grades, but that is not the case this year.  I have a student who did a tremendous amount of work in the past few weeks in order to graduate this year.  Said student has completed so many courses and put in so many hours to try to make up for lots of procrastination.  I have been more lenient than I normally am with this student, as well as some others who also were down to the wire on whether or not they were going to graduate.  However, I've been stressing if I've been too lenient with this one.  My co-worker praises me for being super ethical, so I've been questioning myself on some of this student's work.  Do I pass the student even though some of the work is not to the standard I think it should be at because this student has done so much recently and worked so feverishly to finish?  Or do I make the student do some corrections with me to try to improve the assignment(s) to a point that I feel a little better about?  One of my friends, also a teacher, gave me her thoughts, but if any of you have some, I would love to hear them.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

First Sighting

Today I had my first sighting of the happy couple.  I have been avoiding being places where I have thought I would see them because it just feels uncomfortable to me.  A week ago my roommate and I went to an activity.  As I pulled up, I saw a familiar motorcycle.  I hadn't anticipated him being there, and I didn't feel like I could do it, so I went home.  This weekend I stayed away from two parties.  But today, while I was attending a different congregation for church, my ex-boyfriend and my friend came walking by, hand in hand.  Fortunately for me, I just had another dream about them last night, and they were holding hands in that, so I figure I had already been through that.  Anyway, the other two members of the presidency that I'm a part of at church were there with me.  One of them offered to tell me a worse story to cheer me up and the other one told me she would set me up with her 23 year old son if I wanted.  :)  I love how they try to take care of me.

Anyway, I continue to feel foolish and immature, but I just don't like the idea of seeing them because it hurts.  It feels uncomfortable.  As one of my roommates said, "They're fine and happy, and you're left in the dust."  I told Lu that I don't know if I'll be able to handle it until I'm in another relationship and she suggested that that is because it is then that I will feel like my heart is safe - there might be some truth to that.  In the meantime, I might continue to avoid seeing them as much as I can - except for in my dreams, which they seem to visit frequently.  Now I just have to decide if I can go through with getting together with my friend, which I think she wants to do.  If I don't want to deal with it, (as Lu pointed out) she's in happy engaged land, so she will be okay.