Am I Incapable of Having a Relationship with Someone?

I have decided that I can only handle about 8 dates with a guy before I just know that it's not meant to be. Several years back was probably my first experience with that. I don't know if we actually went on that many dates, but the boy was pretty slow moving, so it dragged things out for awhile. Then there was a shorter, month-long saga recently. And now there has been this past week. I've been out with the boy a few times before. Then this past week seemed to be this marathon of testing the waters, if you will. Monday, Wednesday, Friday (and that was camping, so that probably counts as more), and last night. I'm not sure if I like it that way because then it's over fast. I'm not sure if he's on the same page as I am, but we have another date scheduled next month, so unless things actually turn sour, or something, I would imagine there may be a few more dates, but then that will be it. Fortunately for me, this time I think the boy will decide it's not right, too, so hopefully it will end with nobody feeling hurt.
What I will be (and obviously already am ) feeling is a little frustrated. How do people ever decide that they actually like each other? I hope the boys keep coming, though (Believe me, I'm very surprised and grateful for that part - totally unaccustomed to it.), and that it actually works one of these times.

Emilee said "Cool"

and "I don't know." I swear she did. I've been trying to get her to speak for quite awhile now. We have this deal that if she says "Hi" I will buy her ice cream. Instead of saying it, she likes to smile and sign it (when I think she's perfectly capable of uttering that one simple word). Anyways, I was talking to her on the phone the other day, and I really think I heard "cool" and "I don't know" during the conversation. In fact, I wondered if one of her parents was in the background saying those things to trick me. I told her that I owed her ice cream for talking to me, so when I went to visit her this weekend, we purchased some orange/vanilla ice cream (that she selected) and some cones. By the time we got back to her place, she was asleep, so I didn't get to be there when she got her treat. My sister sent me some pictures of the event (Thanks for taking them!), and I hope she won't mind my posting one of them here.P.S. My brother heard her say "I don't know" while we were driving somewhere the day we went to visit, if that gives more credence to my claim. She wasn't responding to anything in particular - she just said it.

Love Triangles, Revisited

Once upon a time, I posted about a love triangle that I was a part of. I'm afraid I might be a part of one again. Actually, maybe it's bigger than a triangle. It's more like that one song - "He loves her, but she loves him (a different guy), and he loves somebody else." I recently saw this guy that I've been interested in for the last couple of years - stupid Jamie!, I know, but he's so much what I want that it's hard to get over him, I guess. Anyways, seeing him was great, but painful at the same time; I knew it would be. Meanwhile, I'm nervous that this other guy I know is interested in me, which doesn't happen to me very much, so I get pretty distraught over how to handle it. If I'm right, I'm upset because I don't return that interest, and I dread it coming to me having to get that message to him somehow. I was thinking, maybe I should just ask Dream Boy - "How do you deal with me when you have to know how I feel, and you totally don't feel the same?" Because knowing how upset I am over hurting this other friend makes me wonder if Dream Boy gets annoyed with me. I know he cares about me, and I don't see how he could be oblivious to how I feel about him, so is it just totally obnoxious to him that I can't just accept what he has to offer me? Does he wonder why I must insist on ruining a perfectly good friendship? I try to separate my heart self from my friend self for him because I value his friendship and don't want to lose it, but I probably don't always do a good job of keeping how I feel in my heart away from my real, just-friends relationship with him. Oh, the joys of being single and trying not to be.

First Ever Trip to D.C. - continued

Monday

• Uncle Bucks - a restaurant we found near our actual destination. I didn't want to eat at a national chain, so we found this place, and it lived up to its name. The people there were "real, live Southerners," which was too exciting to me. I heard accents, I saw a man kiss a woman's hand, I ate corn fritters.
• Luray Caverns - it's this really cool place that is full of stalactites and stalagmites. One of the cool things about it is an organ that uses the formations for the sounds.
• Next to the caverns is a car museum. Our fee for the caverns included the museum, so we walked around it. It seemed like a random thing to be next to the caverns, but it had some pretty sweet old cars.
• Skyline Drive - beautiful drive through part of the Shenandoah National Park, I think.
• Margherita pizza for dinner - delicious!

Tuesday

• D.C. Temple - Sadly, when we got there, we realized it was closed. The visitor's center was open, though, so we went in and walked through a beautiful exhibit they have right now of bronze sculptures depicting scenes of the Savior and His mortal ministry.
• Mt. Vernon - I was so excited to go there, and it was great! We first watched a little orientation video for Mt. Vernon (hosted by Pat Sajak, no less), as well as a short video about Pres. Washington. The video made me even more excited about being there because I was reminded about what a statesman he was. The grounds were totally beautiful - I can see why Pres. Washington loved his home so much.

There were many things that I didn't get to see. Hopefully I can return sometime, so I can visit more places. I agree with my friend that fall would be a good time.

First Ever Trip to D.C.

I'm halfway done with my trip to D.C. I am SO GLAD that I have had the opportunity to come here. You probably know that I am in to history, you know that I'm in to America and its founding, so I'm having an amazing trip. So far, this is what I have done:

Thursday

• Library of Congress - The Great Hall is beautiful. The architecture is Neo-classical, I believe, and the inscriptions on the walls about learning, books, and God are wonderful. A Gutenberg Bible was there, amongst many other very cool things.
• Good Stuff Eatery - Local, greasy burger and fry joint. Yummy!
• We saw the Supreme Court building, as well as the Capital Building. We actually tried to go into the Capital, but water bottles are not allowed, and as we had nice, non-disposable ones, we left.
• The National Archives - Amazing!! I got to see the Magna Carta (started to tear up), the Declaration of Independence, Constitution, and Bill of Rights. The Declaration is so faded, one can hardly see any of the writing, but it was still awesome to see that original document. I was really touched by a man who was behind us in line that I overheard explaining the value of some of those documents - invaluable.
• National Museum of Art - This is my favorite museum that I visited. It had a French painters exhibit, where I saw many pieces of art in person that I have seen pictures of - Van Gogh, Monet, Rembrandt, David, etc.
• Museum of Natural History and Museum of American History - Hope Diamond, Dorothy's ruby slippers, Kermit, etc.
• Chinatown - We just went to dinner there. The part I saw wasn't very impressive.

Friday

• We dealt with a couple of hiccups - I guess after seeing so much the day before we had to make a payment for it in the form of broken water heater and car.

Saturday

• Arlington National Cemetery - I really like cemeteries, and I wish we had more time for this special one. We only had time to walk to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, where we watched the changing of the guard. Then we had to book it back to the metro. The rows of graves are impressive. I was also glad for the reverence given by the spectators during the changing of the guard, which kind of took awhile. It was a very formal, deliberate event.
• Holocaust Museum - One picks up an I.D. card before starting the tour. The card contains the story of one actual person who lived during the Holocaust. You turn the page at specific times during the three floors of the tour. I didn't get too involved during the first floor of the tour, but it got to me during the second, and I certainly shed some tears, which seem to be coming back now. I didn't even read everything or look at or watch everything I could have. It's just awful to think about what happened. And it's not like it doesn't happen today - there's definitely still genocide today. The last floor has stories about many people who helped hide people during the Holocaust, and that was wonderful to learn about. There were many people who helped, which is heartening.
• The National Portrait Gallery - Very cool! It has portrait paintings of important people in American history (and not-so-important, as well. The biggest painting we saw was of LL Cool J - what??).
• Dinner at Clyde's, which is in or near Chinatown (although it wasn't Chinese food) - Yummy!
• Washington Monument - Too bad we didn't think ahead about getting tickets to go to the top. It was still awesome to see!
• World War II Memorial - I don't know if I was aware of this memorial. It is really beautiful with pillars (each has the name of a different state on it) bordering a pool of water with fountains in it.
• Lincoln Memorial - I kept thinking about Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. Mr. Smith is very reverent about seeing Lincoln. I wish the people there would have been quiet - I think that would have made the experience even better, but the memorial is very impressive. It was very important for me to see it, and I'm so glad I did.
  

Sunday

• Church, End of World Cup (yea Spain!), dinner, and Just Dance. I don't think I have heard of Just Dance before. It's a Wii dance game - I might have to look into purchasing that sometime.
  

Now you know more than you wanted to, and just think, there's more to come . . .

An Observation

I had an appointment with a periodontist yesterday for the first time in my life. My dentist referred me to her. It was kind of weird, and I will tell you why. As the pronoun a couple of sentences ago suggests, the periodontist is a woman. Have you ever had a female dentist? I haven't - weird. Like my dad said, female doctors - yes. Female dentists - no. Have you had a female dentist? I have friends and acquaintances that are dentists - they are all males. To my knowledge there is no kind of law or anything barring women from being dentists, so I just wonder why there is so much disparity. It doesn't bother me - maybe guys just like being dentists, and women are attracted to other professions. It is just strange in today's world. I've had both male and female doctors, both male and female massage therapists, etc. I guess I've never had a male dental hygienist, nor a female chiropractor. Anyway, it was just something I noticed - curious.

One of My Favorite Patriotic Songs

You can listen to this song while you read my 4th of July post, if you want. Or you can just watch it; it's one of my faves.